U.S.—The nation's nerds woke up in a utopia this morning, one where everyone stays inside, sporting events are being canceled, and all social interaction is forbidden.
All types of nerds, from social introverts to hardcore PC gamers, welcomed the dawn of this new era, privately from their own homes.
"I have been waiting my whole life for this moment," said Ned Pendleton, 32 -- via text message, of course -- as he fired up League of Legends on his beefy gaming PC. "They told me to take up a sport and that the kids playing basketball and stuff were gonna be way more successful than us nerds who played Counter-Strike at LAN parties every weekend."
"They all laughed at me. Well, who's laughing now?"
To prepare for the onslaught of the deadly disease, nerds are changing absolutely nothing and are expected to rise up to rule the post-Coronavirus society, as they are the ones best adjusted to being sheltered in a basement, garage, or room for many days at a time marathoning Halo, Half-Life, The Legend of Zelda, Red Dead Redemption, or Horizon Zero Dawn. They're also ready for any post-apocalyptic wasteland, as they've played many, many hours of Fallout and are adept at killing bloatflies and collecting bottlecaps.
Of course, many nerds are running out of hygienic products, but they say that's "not an issue."
Marx schlägt Smith, Arendt killt Heidegger – wer schon immer mal wissen wollte, welche Philosophen ihre Kollegen intellektuell, moralisch oder finanziell in die Tasche stecken, muss einfach nur Karten spielen. Kartenspiel mit 32 Philosophinnen und Philosophen!
Fra apoteket i dag. Deilig kontrast mellom reseptfri Viagra og dette med å holde avstand. Det er ikke pent å skryte. Man skal være ærlig. Jeg måtte nok hatt alle fire for å holde meg på smittesikker avstand i disse coronatider.
Mozart informed his father that he had composed the Serenade K375 ‘rather carefully’ to impress Herr von Strack, a Viennese nobleman sporting the splendid title of ‘Gentleman of the Emperor’s Bed Chamber’.
Mozart informed his father that he had composed the Serenade K375 ‘rather carefully’ to impress Herr von Strack, a Viennese nobleman sporting the splendid title of ‘Gentleman of the Emperor’s Bed Chamber’.
Det er nok det ja. Ikke så unaturlig heller. har man passert 25 og driver avansert sex og skal inn og ut av en slik bil så er man garantert å få alvorlige problemer med ryggen!
Det er nok det ja. Ikke så unaturlig heller. har man passert 25 og driver avansert sex og skal inn og ut av en slik bil så er man garantert å få alvorlige problemer med ryggen!